January 2012
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thenotes:
Allowed a choice in the matter of peeing in public restrooms, I’ll take a closed stall over an exposed urinal or (kill me) communal trough. I’ve been the same all my life, I know, because one of my youngest memories—let’s say age nine—has me wriggling out of the church pew one Sunday Mass and taking my good sweet hymnless time going down to the basement men’s room, which was empty and...
“If you ask anyone who knows me, I’m pretty good at impressions.”
– Drake
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“I mean why the hell do these Darths feel the need to advertise how evil they...”
– Penny Arcade - Star Wars crap
epicwinbook:
It turns out Glenn Beck’s Anon video is viral marketing for his wife’s Mercury One program. It’s a dumb charity with a clumsy mission statement that reads like this, but less elegant somehow.
For example:
The course of the space program, and in many ways that of the United States was forever changed when NASA launched the Mercury Space Program. The Mercury program learned from...
“The Mixmag piece also talks to users of the drug, one of whom,...”
– Users of club drug ‘Roflcoptr’ warned about unknown long term effects | News | NME.COM
“The old mouse was brought out and plugged in beside the new mouse. Still, The...”
– McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: In Which I Fix My Girlfriend’s Grandparents’ WiFi and Am Hailed as a Conquering Hero.
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“INTERNETS, 18th of January 2012.
PRESS RELEASE, FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE.
Over a...”
– The Pirate Bay mocks SOPA with hilarious press release
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Our realtor is a black guy named Nigel
wesley: hear anything from nig today?
me: aaahh, you might want to pick a diff nickname
I am not a hacker.
But in my recent research, I’ve talked with a lot of them. Not just the “lololol we r legion” kind either. The real deal. Guys who now work for McAfee or run their own security contracting firms. When I asked them about whether further government restrictions on internet behavior, like SOPA and PROTECT IP, would limit piracy, their response was unanimous:
“Fucking...
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Hands down, my all-time favorite internet web... →
Think piece I don't have the energy to write but...
nickdouglas:
rachelfershleiser:
Internet memes seem to be moving towards the smallest sub-cultural groups possible and catching on that way.
- I made Judgmental Bookseller Ostrich as a joke on how there was starting to be an advice animal for every possible field/major/career.
- People who didn’t care about Ryan Gosling care once there’s a blog of him talking about a field of stat-based...
“Time heals all wounds. While it might be true, for the Steelers not enough time...”
– Loss still stings Steelers
“It was hard when we lost. Hopefully next year we can win. We really just have to focus our minds on running with the ball, and also throwing and kicking it. It’s important to keep your eye on the prize and not let a loss like this keep you from trying your...
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"Daaaaad, I can't believe you let them send me to... →
nerdshares:
From this article: “Even though the region boasts some of the finest farmland in the world, there is a startling lack of fresh produce here.”
My mother-in-law is a vegan who lives in the woods (yes) in southern Ohio. And even though it’s an hour and a half to the nearest grocery, she and my step-FIL are still alive. People who actually cook for themselves instead of going to...
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“At parties, I will sometimes approach a group of acquaintances already engaged...”
– Matt Jurns Reads a Blog: Jezebel | Slacktory
“We are an award-winning yearbook. We don’t want to diminish the quality with...”
– The Durango Herald | Student editors make call on “sexy” yearbook photo
haha yearbook nerds.
“Holy shit look at this retard. So random. What’s he doing, suckin’...”
– Every single person on every train I used to get from Williamsburg to Harlem at 2:00 am last night while carrying an unboxed vacuum cleaner. Laugh it up, idiots. We’ve all seen stranger things in the subway.
“Now everybody, harass the parents and the publisher. Cole himsel will just laugh...”
– /i/ - Internet 8 Machine
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTttthahhahaahhahaah
(via epicwinbook)
“-one of the coolest things about the audiobook was the narrator….the guy...”
– A 4chan thread about the audio version of my book, which I didn’t even know existed. And now I have to find a copy.
http://its.goofyti.me →
“…they have always seemed to me like they were more about having something...”
– The masterful Gabe Delahaye, on Cleanses
There should definitely be a word for this along the lines of “humblebrag.” Urban dictionary suggests the clunky “bitch-to-brag.”
There is…oh gosh there’s a dumb Twitter account already. Nevermind folks, let’s not...
“Looking at the site, I am greeted with a series of photographs of people in...”
– Matt Jurns Reads a Blog: Laughing Squid | Slacktory
Matt Jurns is bewildered by The Internet.